Dear life. My legs are tired. My mouth is dry. My eyes blink slowly.
The sun shone on the ocean from the top of the santa monica cliffs and 4th street where the plastic people, the iron clad, the make-up’d run up and down stairs for exersize. There are also your average joe people, the just broken up people, the afraid of the sun types and the man in rollerblades running around.
I made the lap of 190 stairs down and 164 stairs up, and the run between the two sets of stairs 3 times before I thought I was going to die. I sat on the grass stretching and catching my breath. I proceeded to do one more run. Then I played catch. My sister did it 8 times. My brother 5.
I can only make declarative statements in past tense. I can only describe what was. My imagination is sore from dreaming last night of lands and times far far away.

Today I wore a bright blue colored robe. It was not navy or royal or aqua or teal blue. It was some strange shade of blue that has yet to be put into words. I sang and I sang and smiled at my family smiling at me as they attended church for the first time in who knows how long. They had come to see me because I had invited them, promising Christmas Carols and Yummy potluck foodstuffs. There were badly sung Christmas carols. Although choirmate Jensaid, “that was fun” when we were done and she had meant it. I wonder about perspectives. Why have a choir, why wish for robes, why when you practice twice you write harmony on the page but never practice or teach it and no one sings be the D L R family and me. Practice in humility?

Yesterday I went to church too. Observing the Shabbat with messianic jews in irvine. They danced so beautifully. It makes so much sense to worship not only with voice and hand claps but with DANCE. So inspiring and fairly multiethnic. the websites not so exciting but the church was so joyfilled it was really an encouraging place to visit. It worth the hour drive. Enjoy. IF I get accepted to UCI I have found a new home church.

This is a blasé post. I feel so discombolulated in my life, I stick to the facts in my blog. Tell don’t show, when your eyes blink so slow.